Anal Sex Toys: A Beginners Guide

Anal Sex Toys: A Beginners Guide

This anal sex toys beginners guide will give you the A – Z on anal sex and how anal sex toys will play such an important – and orgasmic – role in your sex life.

We’re going to cover:

    • What anal sex really is, if it’s as good as they say and if it’s as bad as they say

    • The preparations to make you peachy

    • How to do the delightful deed

    • Hot tips on how to have the best anal sex

Even hotter anal sex toys Without further ado; sit back, strap in (on) and enjoy the ride!

What is Anal Sex?

Many of those in the ‘dark’ about anal sex think the act is categorized as a man penetrating an anus with his penis.

But, this is only one of a few options…

You can also use your fingers and anal sex toys to explore the nether region of a person or use your tongue to stimulate it (known as ‘rimming’).

One of the great things about anal sex is that It really is for everyone.

You can enjoy it whether you’re a man or a woman, whether you’re straight, bi or gay and whether you’re giving or receiving.

Fancy a change in sex roles? 

Women can become givers by using dildos and a strap-on harness (called ‘pegging).

Chances are good that anal sex wasn’t mentioned in sex-ed and you have a few questions. 

Let’s start with the question that brought you here in the first place…

Is anal sex good?

The anus is a pleasure goldmine!

There are thousands of sensitive nerve endings in the anus, which means that stimulating this erogenous zone is incredibly pleasurable.

Better yet, anal play can reach other spots which are known (and loved) for the full-body orgasms they produce.

For men, anal play is the best way to target the prostate, that magical place where mind-blowing climaxes are created.

As for women, anal penetration can indirectly stimulate both the G-Spot and the A-Spot.

In fact, a study found that of the women who had experienced anal sex, 94%

of them had an orgasm.

That’s a persuasive percentage!

Pinup Girl

Now that you have an idea of what it is and why it’s increasingly popular, you might be wondering…

Is Anal Sex Safe?

Anal sex requires more preparation, planning, and communication with your partner than other types of sexual activity.

This isn’t a zero to hero kind of situation, no matter how sexy and spontaneous you’re feeling.

There are also a few things about the anus that you need to keep in mind:

  • the lining is very thin and can tear easily
  • it doesn’t self-lubricate
  • it has bacteria which you don’t want to spread

But, don’t worry!

If you follow the steps explained below and take the proper precautions, then you’ll be having some bum fun in no time.

That said, anal sex is safe.

Anal Sex For Beginners

If it’s your first time, anal sex can seem pretty daunting.

It’s perfectly normal to feel a little weird about putting something into your butthole.

Not to mention that even today it is still considered a tad taboo – which actually makes it even more exciting!

Sometimes (most of the time) it’s nice to be naughty?

To put your mind, and sphincter, at ease, there are some simple steps you need to follow before diving in.

But before anything else, you will need to have an open and honest conversation with your partner.

This is not the time where you can be a bit cheeky, try something and see how it goes.

You still have to knock first before using the backdoor!

You will both need to be very relaxed and comfortable in order to have a positive and pleasurable experience, so there’s really no point in trying to convince your partner if they don’t share your curiosity.

The anal adventure is not for everyone and that’s absolutely fine.

If you are on the same page, remember to keep the lines of communication open throughout the process.


When considering how to prepare for anal sex you will need to follow these steps:

  1. First things first, freshen up.

    While the chance of making a mess is low, going to the toilet and taking a shower before will give you peace of mind and make you feel more comfortable.

    It’s not necessary to use an enema – they have the potential to do more harm than good if overused.

    And be sure to trim your nails to avoid cutting yourself or your partner.

  2. Use protection

    Because the lining of the anus is so thin and tears easily, the risk of transmitting infection or an STD is much higher.

    Using a condom will not only reduce that risk, but it will also help in keeping things clean and prevent the spread of any bacteria.

    On that note, never go from a penis or sex toy in the anus to the vagina without changing the condom first.

    The same applies if you are sharing your anal sex toy; use a new condom for each and every use.

  3. We can’t emphasize this enough: love lube

    Like really, really love it. The wetter the better. You can’t overachieve here.

    There’s a reason why peaches and cream are a winning combination. The cream to your peach is lube and lots of it.

    Unlike the vagina, the anus does not self-lubricate, which means that anal play can cause damage and pain without any lube.

    And no matter what you’ve heard, a numbing cream is not a smart alternative to lube.

    If you’re feeling pain, it means that something is wrong and you should stop. Because of numbing cream, you won’t be able to feel that pain, and you could end up damaging the anus.

    The best lube to use for anal sex is silicone-based because it’s thicker and will last longer. If you’re using a silicone anal sex toy, then you will need to use a water-based lube.

  4. Go solo before trying it with a partner

    Preparing for anal sex also requires some longer-term exercises to get your body ready. These exercises are called anal training.

    Just remember, you need to go slowly and be patient with your body as it adjusts to the new sensations.

    The best way is to start with your fingers; gradually working your way from your pinky finger to your thumb.

    Once you’re comfortable with that, you can dip into anal play.

    The same way you need to learn to crawl before you walk, you need to start with smaller anal sex toys and avoid thrusting at this point.

    Trying anal play alone first is recommended because it takes away any kind of pressure you may feel to perform or speed things up for your partner, as well as makes you more in tune with what pleasures you.

  5. Relax, take it easy (there’s a Mika song in there somewhere)

    If you are tense, then your sphincter muscles will stiffen up and you could experience pain. Breathe deeply and slowly while pushing outward to relax your sphincter.

How To Have Anal Sex

Before you crack on with penetration, you’re going to need to get into the mood with some good ol’ fashioned foreplay to make sure your partner is not only comfortable but super turned on.

Mission accomplished?

Make your way down to the anus and start external stimulation by using your fingers or your tongue to gently caress it.


Now you’re ready for the full monty.

After a generous application of lube, slowly insert the penis or sex toy into the anus just a little bit, and then pull out completely.

Then go in a little further and pull out again.

Repeat this until you or the toy are fully in.

Remember to continuously check in with your partner to find out if you’re going too fast if it hurts, or to get some compliments on the excellent job you’re doing.

If it is painful, then stop immediately!

While this is a different feeling, it should feel like pressure and it should not hurt.

Pain may mean that the anal tissue is tearing and that your body isn’t ready for something this size yet.

Take it slow and revisit this sexperiment once your body is up to speed.

Anal Sex Tips

Now that you know the basics, let’s level up and discuss how to have the best anal sex possible.

Having an orgasm before anal play will work wonders for relaxing the sphincter and making things far more pleasurable — not that you need any convincing…

As for the best anal sex positions for beginners, you can either lie flat on your stomach, get in doggy style, spoon or do missionary.

If the receiving partner would prefer to control the depth and speed of penetration, they can start on top and lower into position.

Finally, if you want to guarantee (another) orgasm, throw other stimulation into the mix.

Once you’ve got your groove with the anal penetration, create a mind-blowing pleasure combination by stimulating the nipples, clit, vagina, penis – whatever you can get your hands on.

Even better, use a sex toy!

The Best Anal Sex Toys To Explore Your Sexual Curiosity

Anal sex toys don’t only play an essential role in anal training, they are in and of themselves the golden ticket to anal orgasms.

You don’t have to be working towards the fifth base to get the most out of these beauties.

If anal play is as far as you’d like to go, then you’ll be plenty satisfied.

One thing before we get to the real good stuff; all anal sex toys should have a flared base.

Without this, your hot night in could end up being a mad rush to the ER and that would be a real “bummer” — excuse the pun!

Butt Plugs

These toys create a sexy feeling of fullness and the anal stimulation will have you feeling extra aroused during any kind of sexual activity.

Butt plugs are perfect for anal play newbies! They come in a variety of sizes, so you can start small and work your way up.

As the saying goes, no two butt plugs are alike.

They range from unassuming and streamline to vibrating, bulbous, and even decorative (we’re talking sparkly crystals for the glamourous and fury tails for the playful).

There are also different materials and textures to choose from, each creating its own unique, delicious feeling.

Anal Beads

Another winner for a beginner, anal beads consists of a string of bulbs that gradually increase in size.

Unlike the butt plug, anal beads create stimulation by being moved in and out of the anus.

You’ll enjoy the toe-curling sensation of beads being slowly inserted one at a time, to create the feeling of fullness, and then removed just as slowly to stimulate the sphincter.

Think deep, deep, tissue massage.

Pro-tip: pull out the beads just as you’re about to climax. You can thank us later 😉

Anal Vibrators

It’s cliché, but it’s true; we’re all about those good vibrations.

Especially the powerful vibrations that will give you intense orgasms.

These vibrators are specifically designed to hit your anal sweet spots and are suited for both men and women.

Prostate Massagers

Let’s hear it for the boys!

Consider these your new power tools – the type that will satisfy you better than your wildest dreams.

As the name suggests, these toys are made to stimulate your P-spot, one of the most sensitive parts of the male body.

As if you needed another reason to try them, regular use of prostate massagers can result in longer-lasting erections and prevent health-related issues down the line. What we’re really saying is that doctors should prescribe them…

Read Why Prostate Massage Is So Damn Good, And How To Do It Right! Hitting That P-Spot here!


The real OG.

In case you missed it, this phallic-shaped wonder is used for penetration by both men and women.

You have plenty of options to choose from here – dildos come in a large array of colours, shapes, sizes, materials, and textures.

But wait, there’s more!

Some of these terrific toys can be incredibly realistic, some are suction-based and some, even, are double-ended.

The only thing to remember when using a dildo for anal sex is to select one with a flared base.

Everything else depends on what tickles your fancy.

Don’t forget your strap-on if you’re pegging!

Get Sexploring With Anal Sex Toys

The bottom line is that anal play can be incredibly re(ar)warding for both you and your partner.

Whether you’re preparing for anal sex or just trying something new, anal sex toys are a definite must-try that will add loads of fun and fireworks to your sex life.

We hope that you found this guide useful and that we managed to answer any questions you may have had on the topic.

If you have any other questions or comments, please drop us a message below and we’ll be happy to get back to you.

Or if you’re in Cape Town, visit us in our Cape Town store.

Stay peachy!